{"id":75,"date":"2026-09-21T14:51:42","date_gmt":"2026-09-21T14:51:42","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/betteryoucoaching.com\/blog\/?p=75"},"modified":"2026-09-21T16:51:50","modified_gmt":"2026-09-21T16:51:50","slug":"what-are-your-non-negotiables","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/betteryoucoaching.com\/blog\/2026\/09\/21\/what-are-your-non-negotiables\/","title":{"rendered":"What Are Your Non-Negotiables?"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Periodically, I take stock.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">When I found myself at my latest career crossroads, I decided to be more intentional about my next move than I had been in the past.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I&#8217;ve always believed in going <strong>toward<\/strong> my next move rather than <strong>away<\/strong> from where I was. Often a new opportunity was right in front of me that satisfied my career aspirations, and I moved.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">This time was different.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Thanks to some wise guidance from my coach, Sadie Wackett, I spent time thinking about my <strong>non-negotiables<\/strong> as I formulated my plan.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">It was a surprisingly powerful exercise.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Not because I suddenly had all the answers. Quite the opposite. It helped me get clearer about the questions I needed to ask.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><strong>What really matters to you?<\/strong> We often evaluate opportunities by asking:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><em>What does it pay?<\/em> <em>What is the title?<\/em> <em>Is it interesting?<\/em> <em>Will I be successful?<\/em> <em>What does it look like on my resume?<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Those are reasonable questions.&nbsp; But what about:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><em>What do I need this next chapter to give me?<\/em> <em>What am I no longer willing to compromise?<\/em> <em>What kind of people do I want around me?<\/em> <em>How do I want to spend my time?<\/em> <em>What do I want more of and less of?<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Those questions get closer to the heart of a decision.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">For me, identifying my non-negotiables created a filter.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">It helped me distinguish between something that was simply <strong>a good opportunity<\/strong> and something that was <strong>the right opportunity for me<\/strong>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">And there&#8217;s an important distinction.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">A non-negotiable isn&#8217;t necessarily something you demand from everyone else. It is a commitment you make to yourself about what you need to do your best work and live the life you want.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Sometimes, our non-negotiables are about circumstances.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Sometimes they&#8217;re about relationships.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Sometimes they&#8217;re about how we want to feel at the end of a workday.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">And sometimes they reveal something we&#8217;ve known for a long time but haven&#8217;t been willing to acknowledge.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><strong>Try this exercise,<\/strong> the next time you&#8217;re at a crossroads, career or otherwise, make three lists and then sit with them, think about what\u2019s next:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\">\n<li><strong>What matters?<\/strong> What do I want more of in my life or work?<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><strong>What am I willing to give up?<\/strong> What am I ready to stop tolerating or spending my energy on?<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><strong>What am I unwilling to compromise?<\/strong> What must be true for my next chapter to be right for me?<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">From these lists, you now create your list of non-negotiables.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Then ask yourself one more question:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><strong>What am I willing to give up to honor these non-negotiables?<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Because that&#8217;s where it gets real.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Every choice has a trade-off. Knowing what matters isn&#8217;t enough. We also must be willing to make choices that protect what matters.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Looking back, I realize that many of my career decisions were good decisions. But I wonder how different some of them might have been if I&#8217;d spent more time defining my non-negotiables before the opportunity arrived.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">That&#8217;s one of the things I love about coaching.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Sometimes we don&#8217;t need someone to tell us what to do.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">We need someone to help us slow down long enough to discover what we already know.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><strong>My non-negotiables:<\/strong> As I reviewed mine, I realized they reflect my life today.&nbsp; The non-negotiables I choose today are not the same as I may have chosen years ago.&nbsp; This exercise highlighted for me the importance of examining our non-negotiables periodically as our priorities and thinking shift.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\">\n<li>Remaining present and invested in my family relationships<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Continuing the deeper connection I rebuilt with my children and grandchildren<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Protecting time for friendships and relationships I refreshed over the past several months<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Prioritizing my health, fitness, and wellbeing<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Maintaining the activities that ground and energize me, including reading and gardening<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><strong>So, what are your non-negotiables?<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><strong>Are your choices reflecting them?<\/strong><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Periodically, I take stock. When I found myself at my latest career crossroads, I decided to be more intentional about my next move than I had been in the past. I&#8217;ve always believed in going toward my next move rather than away from where I was. Often a new opportunity was right in front of [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":79,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"pagelayer_contact_templates":[],"_pagelayer_content":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[5],"class_list":["post-75","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-uncategorized","tag-nonnegotiables-choices-betteryoucoaching"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/betteryoucoaching.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/75","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/betteryoucoaching.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/betteryoucoaching.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/betteryoucoaching.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/betteryoucoaching.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=75"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/betteryoucoaching.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/75\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":80,"href":"https:\/\/betteryoucoaching.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/75\/revisions\/80"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/betteryoucoaching.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/79"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/betteryoucoaching.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=75"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/betteryoucoaching.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=75"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/betteryoucoaching.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=75"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}